Thursday night we went out to dinner with my sister and then she took Samuel to my parents house for the night. I was contracting and we weren't sure if it was the real deal. She was already here so she said it was no big deal to drop him off at my parents. We got his food together and whatever else wasn't already in his bag and sent him off with my sister.
But in the midst of it all I start crying. Sobbing really. I felt so overwhelmed that this - what we have waited so long for - was actually happening. We were going to go to the hospital to give birth to Samuel's baby sister.
As I hugged Samuel goodbye I couldn't hold back the tears. The realization hit me like never before that the next time I saw him, he wouldn't be our only child any more. It was (I thought) the last time we would be a family of three.
Being a family of four is a miracle we can only praise God for, but it is still a change. And sometimes change is hard. And as incredibly excited as I am to meet this little one, it is still a change that I'm preparing my heart and mind for.
We have loved parenting Samuel this past year and giving him all our time and attention. And soon there will be another sibling who will also require our time and attention as well. That realization (and the hormones and the state of being exhausted) brought me to tears.
Samuel has been home with us since Friday (I'm contracting but it's clearly not the real thing), and it's most likely our last weekend together as a family of three. As difficult as it's becoming to keep waiting, I am so thankful for my family of three.