Tuesday, November 17, 2009

What's so amazing about adoption

On April 28, 2008, my husband and I moved out of our town home in the suburbs into the city of Minneapolis. Our town home had sold in 13 days (much to our surprise!), and we didn't have a new home yet.

So we were moving into temporary housing in south Minneapolis until we found a home.

We moved out our stuff on Sunday and I cleaned on Monday. After packing up the last few odds and ends, along with the cleaning products, I remember kneeling on the carpet in the living room of our town home.

I prayed. I prayed about the move. I prayed about our future. I prayed about this crazy thing we were doing: moving into the city to help start a church in Northeast Minneapolis. And then I cried. I sobbed. I bawled my eyes out.

I laid on the floor and poured out all the emotions that come with moving - there were good emotions because I was excited to start on this new journey of following the Lord into the city. There were heart-wrenching emotions because I was about to close the door on another chapter of my life and the chapter had not gone as planned.

Five years earlier when we had moved into our town home on July 27, 2003, the green room upstairs was to be the nursery. Now, five years later, it had been a scrapbook room and then a lounge room. No baby. No nursery.

So I cried out to God that I wasn't suppose to be leaving this town home without a baby. That was not how things were suppose to go. And it was really hard to be closing the door on our time in that town home without seeing my dream come to life.

But here is what is so incredible. This is what is so unreal. This is what's amazing...

That very same day, April 28, 2008, there was a healthy baby boy growing in his mother's womb.

There was a birth mom carrying a child that would soon be my son.

There was a God in Heaven who had a plan that was greater, grander, wiser, more beautiful than the plan I had hoped and waited for.

But I didn't know that. I didn't know about a precious baby boy who was already 16 weeks along in his sweet little life in the womb. I didn't know that I would become a mom just 5 months later.

I can only imagine that God looked down on me, sprawled out on the floor with tears streaming down my face and gently whispered, "Hold on my child. Just wait. Your miracle is already in the making. I know you hurt so desperately today, but just a few sunrises away your dream will come to life."

THAT'S what is so amazing about adoption.


Jeremiah 29:11 said...

Wow, I can't read any of your posts without crying! Honestly, I have to make sure I'm alone when I read your blog. :)

Thanks so much for sharing your heart with us... especially now that you are on the "other side." Your story fills me with so much HOPE. You inspired me to pursue the Lord during these difficult times.

Thank you so much for your gift of faith.

Thankful said...

Thank you so much for sharing this. DH and I are continuing to discuss adoption and are hoping to move forward in the spring. Also, we are ex-pat Minnesotans, so I love your references to the Cities!