Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Praying with your spouse

In nearly 10 years of marriage, Ryan and I have not figured out a successful way to pray together on a consistent basis. We've tried a variety of t things during different seasons of our marriage...but none of them have led to a successful prayer life with my spouse.

In the marriage books I have read, praying for and with your spouse has been declared vitally important.

Why then, is this such a difficult thing for us to do? Usually our prayer life as a couple involves one of us praying while we lay in bed together before we drift off to sleep. We are weary from a busy day of parenting two little ones, so we pray quickly about whatever comes to mind. If prayer is so valuable to us, and we place a high priority on it, how can this be the extent of our prayer life as a married couple?

Ryan dislikes praying in the dark because he often drifts off to sleep. I, on the other hand, am not necessarily a super happy person in the wee hours of the morning, so the idea of praying together upon waking (before the kids are up) is not appealing...but maybe I just need to suck it up and do it!

If I say prayer is a priority, then it seems I need to come up with a workable, sustainable system. So here is where all of you come in: If you are married, when and where do you pray with your spouse? How frequently? For how long? And what does that prayer time look like with your spouse? One of you prays, both of you pray, from memory or do you pray through a list? How do you keep track of the prayer requests you need to pray through? 

I would love to hear what has worked in your family (or what you saw your parents do when you were growing up).

It seems like our passion for the Lord should compel us to set aside time every day to pray as a couple. I want that to be true of us.

I look forward to hearing from you!


cybil said...

for us (11 yrs married), it's a very spontaneous thing (apart from praying before dinner and before sleeping) - we talk about things and then we pray for it - in the car, at home, when we take a walk. it worked always well - we 're not so much list-praying people, more spontaneous for what is on our heart...

Anna C said...

I feel the same way, Stacy. We just cannot seem to get consistent with this, but we both want to soo badly. We are the same way with our morning and night preferences. I'm looking forward to see what responses you get!

Nicole said...

Just found your site from Ambers blog... great post! We struggle with this same thing... and have tried, but our prayers are more as we drift off to sleep. I'll be back to see what other bloggers share.

AshMasterFlash said...

Chad & I's prayer life has basically been me telling him that we should pray, then trying to commit to praying, then not doing it. I'm glad to know we're not alone! :) I desire to know God deeply in our spiritual lives within our marriage, and always thought my husband & I would have a consistent prayer life...but it's easier said than done.