Saturday, May 28, 2011

A belated celebration

This week the Census Bureau reported that for the first time, the percentage of American households represented by married couples has fallen to 48%. In 1950 it was 78%. So that means less than half the homes in the U.S. do not have a traditional husband and wife relationship represented. 

Typically I don't care to be a statistic, but today I'm so grateful to be in that 48%. Because I have friends who long for husbands and homes and a family of their own. I have friends who have been served divorce papers when that's the last thing they wanted to receive. And I have a friend who has lost her spouse and would give anything to still be in that 48%.

In the spirit of celebrating marriage, on Thursday Ryan and I packed a suitcase, kissed our kiddos goodbye, boarded a bus and headed 20 minutes away to downtown Minneapolis.

It wasn't far in miles or in minutes, but we enjoyed a sweet time together in honor of our 10th wedding anniversary last March. My sister stayed with our kids (thank you so so much Auntie Sherry) and we used the rest of Ryan's hotel points from his days of frequently traveling for work. I saved some gift cards and movie tickets from the past couple months so that our celebration could be memorable and economical.

We were gone just under 48 hours - 2 nights. But those two nights were a necessary time of refreshment for our hearts, our minds, our bodies and our marriage.

We napped. We strolled. We people-watched. We read (well I mostly read while Ryan watched shows on TBS, TNT and other channels we don't get at home). We ate. We went to a movie. But most of all, we lived clock-free. Meaning, we ate breakfast at 10, lunch at 2 and dinner at 7:30 (and by lunch I mean popcorn and pop at the theater one day and two margaritas and a big bowl of chips and guacamole another day). We slept in. We had no agenda and no time restraints. It was d e l i g h t f u l.

We discussed the past year and what's been hardest about Ryan's unemployment. We talked about core values for our family and came to an agreement on a few of them that are important to both of us. We thought aloud about the future, if we wanted more children and whether we desired more biological children or hoped to adopt again. I shared my fear of not being able to conceive if we tried to get pregnant again one day and my fear of a birth mom not choosing us if we pursued adoption.

We each shared some of our personal highlights during the last 10 years of marriage. I don't think we celebrate milestones enough. I think we get busy and we let birthdays and anniversaries and other celebrations pass by without acknowledging them. But we're trying hard these days to slow down and take time to celebrate or acknowledge important dates, memories and milestones.

And this weekend was a celebration of our marriage.

I almost completed Bittersweet this weekend, and the following quote touched me deeply: "You, my dear friend, will be a bride for one day, but you will, with God's grace and your very own hard work, be a wife to this man every day for the rest of your life. Being a bride is super-fun, but it pales in comparison to the thrill and beauty of being a part of one of the truly greatest partnerships. Make your love story one worth telling. Make it one worth living, every day, as long as you both shall live."

It is because of God's unending grace, along with a heavy dose of forgiveness and an unshakeable foundation of commitment, that we've made it 10 years. We've had our share of tears and our times of laughter and we've chosen to keep our eyes on Jesus through all of it.

Glory to God.

1 comment:

cybil said...

Happy anniversary!
It sounds that you had a marvellous time! We'll have twelve years in summer!