Monday, May 16, 2011

Don't wait

Yesterday I started cleaning and organizing some piles in my bedroom. It's gotten bad over the last six months....books, papers, folders, cards, more books, crafting supplies, etc. It's beginning to feel like the clutter is taking over, so I decided it was time to start going through the mess.

Ryan and I watched a movie while I went through each piece of paper to determine if it went in the keep or toss pile.

I got to the very last thing in my pile and when I saw what it was, my heart hurt. A large white cardboard envelope. Inside a Sudoku book, a get well card, a picture of Samuel and an iTunes gift card. It was a 'thinking of you' package that I never sent. I gathered the items inside, bought a card about how pets help people recover for my friends who have a bunch of dogs. Lauren was born in September, our friend was diagnosed with cancer in October and I gathered the items to mail in the winter of 2010.

I got busy. I had a newborn. I was sleep deprived. My two young children get my preoccupied.

I waited to mail it because I wanted to find one more thing to add to the package and because, at times, I forgot about it.

Then I got a call in February that my friend's husband had died that morning.

Just like that. The cancer didn't kill him, but his heart had stopped while he was feeding his dogs.

And I hadn't sent anything. Not a single card in over a year to my friends who were just one year into their marriage and fighting cancer.

Had they lived in my city I would have visited in person, hugged, cried, brought food and listened to the realities of life with chemo. But they lived across the country so I planned to mail them my love and support.

Except I didn't do it. I never got around to it.

And now the package sits in my room and it's a reminder of what I didn't do.

When I see it I have to choose whether to let the guilt eat me up inside, or choose to learn from this and use this lesson to make me wiser and help me to take the actions I want to take in my life.

I hope and pray it will drive me to.....

write that letter

mail that card

send that email

make that phone call

schedule that visit

bring that meal

give that hug

Life is fleeting. We are not guaranteed tomorrow friends. There is no promise for ourselves or others beyond today. 

Don't wait. Whatever it is that's gnawing at you today, don't wait.

3 comments:

RKW said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

this supports that: http://proverbs14verse1.blogspot.com/2011/05/i-am-done-waiting.html

Abigail said...

Beautiful post. Been there. Done that. Hope to get off the "I'll do it tomorrow train" too!