Thursday, June 16, 2011

Adoption conversation

On July 17 Ryan and I are hosting a Sunday Conversation in our home. These Sunday Conversations are about any topic people at our church are passionate about. Individuals come up with the idea and schedule a conversation. July 17 we will be talking about adoption.

There is a couple attending who has two boys and are interested in adopting a girl to expand their family.

There is a young couple attending who cannot have biological children, and want to talk through adoption options.

And my hope is that we can encourage some couples to attend who have never considered adoption, but might be open to learning more about it

I've been thinking about adoption even more lately because I'm currently reading Choosing to See by MaryBeth Chapman. Who, in case you aren't aware, is married to Steven Curtis Chapman and has adopted three daughters from China.

I have thoroughly enjoyed reading about the process that led them to adoption and their experience of adopting internationally. Reading their story and hearing about these sweet baby girls they flew across the world to meet, has made me fall in love with adoption all over again.

While reading I've been contemplating our upcoming adoption conversation and what that might look like.

I'd love to hear your thoughts about adoption: If you were having a group discussion about adoption (with people who have adopted and with those interested in adoption), what would you want to ask? Or what would you want to know from others? Or what would you want to share with those interested in learning more about adoption?

Please share with me!


Leah said...

Hi Stacy,
I went to school with your husband, and my husband and I have adopted a boy from Ethiopia. I love all discussions around adoption, and it's definitely something I've become passionate about. :)

I want people to know that it isn't a second choice or second best. Many people do choose adoption because of infertility issues, and many couples think thye could never love their adopted child as much as a biological child. Well, a few months into our adoption process I got pregnant, and am now raising two children 7 months apart (does this story sound similar to yours at all?) and let me tell you. . . adoption definitely isn't second best. I am in love with both of my children. :)

Patiently Waiting...... said...

As I am 3 months into the waiting period to be matched with a potential birth mother, I realize how helpful it is to talk with others who have experienced adoption. Even though every story is different it is so reassuring to hear about the journeys. I agree with Leah, about emphasizing that adoption isn't second best. I am struggling with infertility but regardless of whether we get pregnant adoption is a separate yet equal choice. I couldn't imagine my life without my two adopted nieces. They are 100% meant to be a part of my family.

Kez71 said...

Hi Stacy
I have been following your blog for a while..your messages have given this infertile a lot of hope and helped me with my faith..a lot actually! So thankyou.

As for adoption..i think its a wonderful thing. I always thought if I can't have my own child, then i will adopt..I never thought anything of it until we couldn't have our own. My hubby and I have tried for 5 years.Testing has revealed both my tubes are blocked. It was time to look into adoption. I live in Australia and it turns out adoption is very difficult here. Less than 50 children are adopted annually and most of them are within their own family. Why is this so? Because our welfare system is so good to families and unwed mothers that they can afford to keep their babies.
Don't get me wrong, i think its wonderful that people can keep their babies that in the past they would give up, but it does mean there isn't many babies to adopt. The waiting period is 7 to 10 years, if at all. I am already 39 and hubby is 43, so 7 to 10 years is too long.
So I decided to look into international adoption. I had read it usually took 3 to 5 years and cost $80,000. I couldn't believe it was true so emailed the only international adoption agency I could find online. They wanted $250 to send me an information maybe $80,000 is right..we don;t have that sort of money.

So hubby and I have started IVF treatment. we actually have a better chance to have a baby with IVF than through adoption which seems rediculous.

I know a lady in USA who has adopted 9 children. she pretty much picked them off websites as if she were buying shoes. The abundance of children for adoption over there seems enormous. Its so sad that we can't help them.