Sunday, January 18, 2015

Be Still My Soul

Shortly after Ryan’s diagnosis last spring, a dear friend sent me a link to Be Still My Soul by Kari Jobe.

The tears fell from my eyes for days every time I listened. The words seemed as though they were straight from the Lord’s mouth to my tender, hurting heart.
The lyrics are full of truth and grace and beauty in the midst of hardship.
Eight months later this song continues to be a healing balm to my soul. I find that listening to it gives me permission to grieve. In December I was on my way to a friend’s house to work on Christmas cards and I listened to this song in the car. I couldn’t stop the tears and I cried the entire 25-minute drive. Not because anything in particular happened that day, but because it was a reminder that God continues to call me to Him to be still in His presence on the hard days. He is beckoning me...come, be still, rest in Him, and place my hope in Him.

There continue to be days when it feels like the waves are crashing over me and I’m struggling to get my head above water. I’m trying to breathe, but the panic sets in and my fear of the future feels too heavy to bear…

It's those days, those moments, when I am reminded that God guides the future just as He has the past. That in every change faithful
He remains. And that I place my life within His hands alone.

Be Still My Soul (In You I Rest)
Be still, my soul, the Lord is on thy side
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain
Leave to thy God to order and provide
In every change He faithful will remain

Be still, my soul, they best, they heavenly friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end
Be still, my soul, thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake
All now mysterious shall be bright at last

Be still, my soul, the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below
In you I rest, in You I found my hope
In you I trust, You never let me go
I place my life within your hands alone

Be still, my soul

Be still, my soul, the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord
When disappointed grief and fear are gone
Sorrow forgot, loves purest joys restored
Be still, my soul, when change and tears are past
All safe and blessed we shall meet at last

In you I rest, in You I found my hope
In you I trust, You never let me go
I place my life within your hands alone

Be still, my soul

In you I rest, in You I found my hope
In you I trust, You never let me go
I place my life within your hands alone
Be still, my soul


~Jenn~ said...

I love this song. I checked in on your blog a while back and found your news about heart ached for you. And stood in that frame of...why God? Why this precious, sweet family who has already endured so much?! I don't understand, and I don't know His reasons...but do know that God is holding you tight and carrying you when you can't walk. He is giving you another avenue, another part of your testimony, to reach those who desperately need Him. I will pray for you and your family!!!

Years ago, you sent me a sweet poem (The Wait Poem) and a CD of uplifting songs during our time of infertility. I passed those along to my sister-in-law when she went through the same struggle and a failed adoption. I am ecstatic to report that our family has grown immensely since then...thank you so much for being there for me when life was SO, SO tough!

Max said...

I just stumbled on your blog and felt touched by your story. I hope you will find words again, if only because I've found words are healing. Sometimes life seems overwhelming because God has a plan for our witness. Granted I've been as often as anyone wondering "what could God want to do with me that he will use this pain?" I don't know how to offer comfort apart from to say you aren't alone. Many of us are on the same path, living through one heartbreak at a time, yet hoping still to understand in time. He does have comfort, for you, for me. His days are coming, and hope planted in him isn't wasted.

Anonymous said...

Hi.. I don't know you personally but felt our souls connected. No updates from you soo far. Is everything alright there? May the peace of Jesus Christ fill your hearts and home.

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